MY OWN Special Valentine

Valentine? No, my sister's name was Valentinah, Born on the 14th February, she was blessed to see her 24th Birthday, and death suddenly took her from us. Till this very day I still have unanswered questions. On the day left home she said; "I am going to South Africa and I will be back tomorrow". As a written rule of our house, whenever you travelled you were always meant to let our parents know you arrived safely, so she arrived she called to say she had  arrived safely. Later on during the day, the phone rang,  my brother picked up the phone but disconnected the call as the line wasn't clear , after which he said to our "though I couldn't quite  hear whomever was on the phone, it certainly sounded like Valentinah". We then heard that the same person called my  grandparents house line and my uncle hang up the phone as he also  couldn't hear this person, uncle also said this person sounded like Valentinah. The next phone call was from the hospital, by the time my whole family got to SA, she ( my little sister Valentinah } had passed on. Our whole world was shuttered, we all thought. Someone like her, one very lively person. It was exceedingly traumatic to all of us. My mother didn't really see where Valentinah was laid to rest, she cried like a child, everyday, she could not even open her eyes. Who would blame her? I stood strong for my family, I did not shed a tear, especially as  some aunties said to me; "don't let your mother see you cry, as you seem to have been her strength".
When Valentinah's body arrived from SA, I went with the parents to go identify her body. Seeing  those wounds on her chest ripped my heart apart, but still had to remain strong for everybody else.
For me it had not been an easy journey, it has been 13 years but it still feels like yesterday. I think of her all the time, preeminently this moth of her birth.Years later I have caught myself crying. Sometimes  I wish I could forget her completely. But she was part of our lives. Never to be forgotten. One question that never left me; WHAT DID SHE WANT TO TELL US WHEN SHE CALLED. NONE CAN TELL. For years I kept thinking I should have been home when she phoned because I would have been patient enough to hear what she wanted to say! ....

So this year Solloh and I decided to go out for dinner, take some moment to remember her and appreciate those years  we spent with her. As we talked and laughed sharing those Fascinating memories, I found myself going on and on, and Solloh and I were laughing and crying at the same time so I realised we actually needed that time. I was going to share Valentinah's pictures here, but as went through them I realised how unprepared I was. So I decided to share pictures of my little sister Solloh and I that night.

From as long as I remember growing up, Valentinah was always a standout amongst us her siblings, she was very special. Growing up together as girls, meant we were always fighting. Main fights was between my big sister and Valentinah.  I remember during one of the fights Valentinah fell and felt defeated so she shouted; "please stop beating me, I think I have fainted, I have collapsed, stop". Haha, made me chuckle. But then in another fight ( still between the two), she ran away from my big sister, so my big sister took a high heeled shoe and sent it down her way, it landed on Valentinah's head and She sustained a cut on her head, that needed suturing. Bless!! Anyhow, my mother had to take her to the hospital which was in another town not far from my village.  Coming back I expected more fighting BUT the girl just looked at my big sister and said; "thank you, if it wasn't for you I wouldn't have gone to town, my mum wouldn't have bought me the nice things she bought me today". I mean, honestly, wasn't she just amazing!! 

On the other hand, I wasn't a fan of fighting, I would probably just use words instead. As a young girl, at 16 years, I gave my life to Christ. I became a Christian at a young age. Back in those days in my country (I am sure many other old Christian can relate with this) there were so many rules and laws; No trousers, No jewellery, no circular music and the list go on. So my baby sister Valentinah had decided to keep an eye on me, from hence forth she decided my name was *Sister Studu* (that's what we called each other in churches/ Scripture Union groups).

How many of you know that when you hear a song playing on the radio over and over, you may end up unconsciously singing along?? Yeah!! I did that and the next thing I heard was Valentinah going' err,, oh my God , sister Studu you are singing a song of the world!!". She was always just there ready to put me back in place. 

She would always go for Crusades and she would be upfront for all the alter calls, I would see ushers carrying her, but if i asked her; "Did you fall under he power of the Holy Spirit?" she would say; "NO, I just saw some ushers standing behind me so I pretended to fall so they catch me and carry me'.. How am I supposed to forget all these things??

I lived  in a different towm, but every time I went to the village for weekend, I would go for Church ,and Scripture Union meetings, she loved coming along. And she would carry a note book. Then I would see her writing, but If I asked her; so did you learn something? I saw you writing?. She would answer;" Oh yes, I carried my book because you SU members really know English, so I carried  my book just to write down new terms, those big words, to improve my English. Ha ha, and I am there thinking she is writing some bible verses. She had the answer for everything.

There was just one message she caught up in all these meetings, she would preach it to me over and over; " Always give the best to God! Give the best sister Studu"! She would say.

 I never announced my fasting but if she ever figured out I was fasting, she would say;" err..Sister Studu, I just hope you are not fasting because you don't like what mum is cooking today, I want to see you fasting when we are cooking your favourite meal." Give the best. But then again  she would use the same message for her own  benefit , she would say; "which of these dresses do you like more? Can I have it".

Not only was she crazy, she was also very caring. She never wanted to see any of her siblings hurt. She was younger and yet she always fought for my big sister and I. If we were ever in trouble with our very strict aunty , she would say, " I want you two( my big sister and I) to keep quite, let me do all the talking, I will answer all the questions". Gosh and she would do, She much to say about this but I will have to share this bit on my next writting.

When we both working, she would visit me, and she would take me out shopping. I didn't mind drinking tap water but she would go fill my kitchen with bottled water. She never wanted to drink tap water. Its very little things like that. I remember when we took her body back home, after all was taken, all that was left in her handbag was a bottle of water.

Back then if you asked anyone in the whole village, direct you to Valentina's mum's house, they would. If you said Studu, they would probably ask; Stu-what??  haha.I could go on, there is just so much funny  memories.  I shared some tears while writing this but I laughed a lot also.

CONTINUE TO REST IN PERFECT PEACE OUR VALENTINAH, UNTILL WE MEET AGAIN

             YOU LIVE FOREVER 

      IN OUR HEARTS LITTLE SISTER